Friday, April 27, 2012

On being a “Dyke/Fag”

Originally posted by blickblocks

So, while I’m not concerned about “appropriating” gay cis men’s term “fag”, I have been concerned about stepping on the toes of queer trans men in my life lately.

Growing up I definitely did identify as a boy. A boy who wished they could be a girl. Specifically a tomboy (I sucked at athleticism, but tomboys could be geeky nerdy introverts too!). I didn’t really identify with any normatively gendered/sexually oriented men or women adults back then, but I always did gravitate towards depictions of feminine men and masculine women who tended to be gay and lesbian. Gay men were always shown as being sassy, smart, popular, creative, and beautiful. Lesbians were shown as honest, hardworking, strong, charming, and independent. I wanted to be all of these things! I like to think that who I am today is very much in line with these positive archetypal characteristics, although you probably want to throw in a bit of awkward (maybe charming awkwardness? I can hope).

In terms of my sexual attractions, genitalia has never been a big thing for me, I don’t really care much either way what someone has down there. I’m really attracted to femme women, butch women, genderqueer/nonbinary people of all expressions, and fem men. The thing that makes my use of the term fag questionable is that I really am an mtf transsexual. If there were an option that didn’t involve expensive, complicated, and health endangering surgery, I would totally want a normative FAAB body. I want that so bad it hurts. Right now I just have a very androgynous body from being MAAB and being on hormones for the past 4 years. It’s frustrating having the body I was born into. At the same time, it’s liberating being able to pass as one binary gender or the other depending on what clothes I wear, or how I cut my hair. Not everyone who is genderqueer is able to pass as androgynous, I suppose that’s a passing privilege in itself (at least within queer communities).

Anyways, so if I was FAAB, and didn’t identify as a man, what right would I have to call myself a fag? I never identified as gay even as a MAAB person. When I told my parents I was trans* in high school they didn’t believe me, and my mom said she thought I was just gay and in the closet about it. They didn’t believe that I was primarily attracted to women and female people (why would someone transition if they would become queer?). Being out as trans* and letting myself express a less binary gender has let me open myself up to being attracted to men and male people, but to me this is anything but heteronormative sexuality. When I’m out with my best friend I like that people don’t know whether we’re a pair of dykes or a pair of fags. I think this might be partly why I’m always so attached to visibly queer and gender nonconforming folks in my life.

Dyke/Fag: I guess I sorta feel like I’m asking for my cake and eating it too.

Monday, April 23, 2012

Genderqueer Circle

This coming Sunday, April 29th, at 4pm we'll have our 2nd genderqueer circle!  It'll be hosted by Lou in Andersonville; email gendqueerchicago@gmail.com for address and directions.  Circles are best when smaller, so we'll cap it after the first 7 people respond.  And please be on time, as we can't start until everyone arrives. 

Here's a little more info on our facilitator and circles:

Lou was trained as a circle keeper by Community Justice for Youth Institute (www.cjyi.org) and has been doing circles for about 4 years.  Circles can be used for restorative justice, conflict resolution, healing, celebration, and just about anything that brings people together in an honest and meaningful way.  The emphasis for these genderqueer circles will be on personal healing and meaningful sharing. 
 
The main difference between a common conversation and a circle is that circles have a bit more structure.  There's a talking piece that signifies whoever has it can talk or be silent or pass, and that when you don't have it you can listen.  It allows for deeper communication because you can listen without worrying about what you'll say next and speak without worrying if someone will interrupt you.  There's an opening and closing round to establish confidentiality and the circle decides when it's done, though they generally last about 3 hours.  There is no therapist or outside person present, and these genderqueer circles will only be open to folks through Genderqueer Chicago.  Please come and enjoy!

The Interwebs: A Safe Space Discussion

Wednesday, April 25, 2012
7:00-8:15PM

Stone Soup Cooperative - Leland House

1430 West Leland Avenue  Chicago, IL 60640


The internet has changed the way we communicate with each other and share information. What have your experiences as a gender variant person been on the internet? Is it different when you're gaming vs. posting on Tumblr? Facebook vs. Skype? What does the internet mean for you? 
Genderqueer Chicago is as safe a space as we can make it. To help with this, we have some working agreements that we would like all who come to meetings to keep in mind while within our safe space meetings. Please check out our working agreements here.

Safe space meetings are strictly closed to researchers and reporters in their professional capacities. Meetings are open to anyone else wanting to talk and think about gender! For more info, give us a shout atgenderqueerchicago@gmail.com!

Monday, April 16, 2012

Open Topic: A Safe Space Discussion

What do you want to talk about? Something been on your mind? Something from a previous meeting that you wanted to keep talking about? A topic you haven't seen happen yet? New ideas for gender variant liberation? We want to hear!

Wednesday, April 18th, 2012

7:00-8:15PM

Center on Halsted 2nd Floor (ask for room number at reception desk)
3656 N. Halsted St.


Genderqueer Chicago is as safe a space as we can make it. To help with this, we have some working agreements that we would like all who come to meetings to keep in mind while within our safe space meetings. Please check out our working agreements here.

Safe space meetings are strictly closed to researchers and reporters in their professional capacities. Meetings are open to anyone else wanting to talk and think about gender! For more info, give us a shout at genderqueerchicago@gmail.com!

Saturday, April 14, 2012

GqC Board Game Afternoon


Sunday, April 22
1:00-4:00pm

1501 W Morse Ave (Morse and Greenview)
1 Block from CTA Morse Red Line

Join GqC for an informal gathering to play board games on a Sunday afternoon. We will have games and you're welcome to bring your favorites as well. See you there!

Trans & Genderqueer Open Mic

Center on Halsted and GqC are proud to present...

T and GQ OUT Mic
Every Third Thursday of the Month @ 7:30pm
Center on Halsted Youth Space (2nd floor, behind computer lab)
3656 N. Halsted (at Waveland)

Upcoming Open Mic Dates:

THIS THURSDAY Thursday, April 19th, 7:30pm

Thursday, May 17th, 7:30pm

Thursday, June 21st, 7:30pm


T Out Mic is pairing with GenderQueer Chicago to host an all together awesome open mic and spoken word monthly event open to all. We encourage all gender variant folks, their friends, and allies, to bring a talent, thought, or rant to share. Each performer gets 5 minutes to do their thing and we may have time for encores.

All GQC events are no-cost, cta accessible, and wheelchair accessible.

Transport: EL: Redline to Addison. Bus: #8 Halsted. Street Parking.

See you there!

Sunday, April 8, 2012

Being an Example: A Safe Space Discussion















In recent weeks we've talked allies and our own role models. This week, let's discuss the examples we try to set for others and the pressures we face.

Have there been times when you've been a positive role model for others, or tried to be? As a trans* or queer person, do you feel that you ought to set an example? What would it mean to you to make a positive contribution? In situations where you are visible, do you feel pressured to set an example or play a certain kind of role?

Wednesday, April 11th, 2012
7:00pm to 8:15pm
Stone Soup (4637 N. Ashland Ave.)

Please call or text Brynn at 708.655.2732

Genderqueer Chicago is as safe a space as we can make it. To help with this, we have some working agreements that we would like all who come to meetings to keep in mind while within our safe space meetings. Please check out our working agreements here.

Safe space meetings are strictly closed to researchers and reporters in their professional capacities. Meetings are open to anyone else wanting to talk and think about gender! For more info, give us a shout at genderqueerchicago@gmail.com!

Sunday, April 1, 2012

Assimilation: A Safe Space Discussion at a NEW LOCATION


Assimilation is a hot topic in queer circles. Let's talk about it. Some folks want to blend, "pass," or fit-in. Where does this trend come from? Other folks want to stick out. Why? What does assimilation for queer and trans* folks mean? Does it work for you? Does it not? Does it sometimes? What implications does it have for society? Is it something you want to challenge? If so, how?

Wednesday, April 4th , 2012
7:00-8:15PM

Center on Halsted (RM 201)
3656 N. Halsted St.


Genderqueer Chicago is as safe a space as we can make it. To help with this, we have some working agreements that we would like all who come to meetings to keep in mind while within our safe space meetings. Please check out our working agreements here.

Safe space meetings are strictly closed to researchers and reporters in their professional capacities. Meetings are open to anyone else wanting to talk and think about gender! For more info, give us a shout at genderqueerchicago@gmail.com!

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